Monday, January 24, 2011

This is for the ladies! Only because men can't relate AT.ALL!

Yep, this blog is actually about what all of us ladies deal with and dread every.single.month.  

Do I even really need to spell it out?  I didn't think so.

So I have always thought this was just some kind of cruel and usual punishment for women.  

God you're a righteous man and I love you but REALLY?  


Every month it comes and every month I moan and groan about it thinking didn't I just see you two weeks ago?  Oh, it was a month?  Sure doesn't seem like it.  Well in that case welcome back. NOT!

We have had all the kids we plan on having or not planning on having because it just isn't happening again.ever!  So now I find myself every.single.month praying to God to please let me go through menopause just so I don't have to deal with all of this anymore.  I know I know that will just create a new batch of issues but you know what I wouldn't have to buy these stupid tampons anymore!

What is it with those things anyway?  They cost a small fortune and one box is NEVER enough to get through the whole week so you have to buy two.  It is a conspiracy I tell you!  Honestly they could charge you whatever the hell they want to because you MUST have them.  I wish I could invent something that every single woman on the planet MUST have at least once a month.  CHA CHING!

And not only do I have to buy them for me it is becoming very close to the time my daughter will start needing these as well.  GASP Please say it isn't so!  But reality is it could happen anytime soon.  Then we will be buying FOUR boxes of these things.  

Seriously need to consider going to Sam's for these soon.  

Loudspeaker Woman:  Hey Marv can I get a prize check on the super size box of Ultra Absorbent Playtex Tampons 1,000 count?

Thanks lady this just isn't embarrassing enough!  

And have any of you heard that girls are starting to get their periods earlier and earlier in life?  Someone told me not long ago of an 8 year old that started!  E.I.G.H.T.!  Wth?  That poor girl!  I have read that it has to do with the hormone injections they give cows.  Ashley.. PUT THAT MILK DOWN NOW!  And no, you can't have a steak, or a hamburger, or a slice of roast or anything else that comes from a cow.  

Not because I think it is bad for you, I just can't afford all those extra tampons right now!

I think I need a part time job.

Okie dokie, well I have spoken my peace about this little issue now I have to go eat all the chocolate I can find in the house.  IF that damn "not me ghost" hasn't eaten it all.  PIG!

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